an old fashioned man

All my life I've been prone to bouts of heavy daydreaming/fantasizing. In my 3rd grade in school I became completely obsessed with everything 1950's. The music, dances, actors, actresses, old relics, etc. etc. I had my great grandmother make me a poodle skirt out of bubblegum pink felt, complete with a poodle on a ric-rac chain. I had a sweater with the initial 'K' on it. I collected dusty glass Coke bottles. I wore saddle Oxfords. I wanted the flooring in my bedroom to be re-made with black and white checked tiling. "Grease" was the word.

In my world it was 1956.

This is probably one reason why I've loved old photos all my life. I never cared so much if I knew the people or were related to them or not. Every face had a story, even when that story was long gone. I would love to open boxes and just look at the photos, notice all the tiny details, guess as to the personality of this person, that person; whether they were good or not, how they spent their lives, what they had loved and hated.

The lives of those who came before me always fascinated me and I always somehow craved for what I believed those bygone eras to be. I always gathered a sense (perhaps now that I am older, a very fanciful & overly optimistic sense) that the people from these eras were good. Men wore hats and ladies wore gloves and both were nice to each other and that was that.

I always longed to one day grow up and create this perceived environment for myself. I readily bought into the packaged sitcom dream that one day some bright young chap would sweep me off my feet and off into the sunset we'd go. After that there would be nights at the cinema, big homemade Valentine's cards, stupifying Easter egg hunts, giant turkeys with made from scratch stuffing and an enormous Christmas tree with dazzling lights and beautifully wrapped gifts under it.

In this way, I guess you could say I was and remain a frivolous, traditional girl.

But these things, all these traditional frivolities, are what makes my life meaningful. The beautiful things, being surrounded by people you can just breathe with, creating memories that carry you through life, associations and feelings. Its what I love to be a part of. Its where I feel home.

And all this is to say, that really, the one thing that I am constantly grateful for is that this has happened that way for me in life. I have found that bright young chap who doesn't mind me going off the deep end with all my memory making schemes. And so many times I feel as though I have married the person of my bygone era dreams. Because there's never a truer gentleman than the one I married. He'd take me to the dance, even in a bubblegum pink felt poodle skirt that won't close and barely reaches my knees now. I just know it.